Written by: Jeff
Watch Out For That First step, It’s a Doozy!
Groundhog Day (not Groundhog’s Day) is soon approaching and the question on everyone’s lips (their chap lips) is why do we still do this? The history of Groundhog Day is just as dumb as you would think it is. In European times they used to use a badger or a bear to predict the weather. They didn’t use groundhog cause they used to eat groundhog…tastes like chicken. It also has some roots in the Pagan festival of Imbolc which celebrates the beginning of spring. Those pagans celebrate everything by making love like sea otters. The first known American written record of someone talking about Groundhog Day was in 1841. Everyone knows Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania is the place where Phil Conners had his hilarious run in with the groundhog and his followers but it’s also the largest Groundhog Day festival in the world. It is believed that on this day the groundhog or bear or badger will awake from winter dormancy, and if in this sleepy and confused state it sees its own shadow, it will get scared and go back to sleep for an additional 40 days, thus prolonging the winter. Consequently, if it is sunny, it is the sign that the winter is not over yet. If it is cloudy, it is a good sign that the winter is about to end. In Germany if it rains that day it is supposedly going to be a very rainy summer. And in Great Britain if it rains it is predicted that it will rain for the next 40 days and nights. Noah was from London? It only rains an average of 126 days a year in London, regardless of how phenomenally dreary it is all the time.
We all know Punxsutawney Phil is the name of the seer of seers, the prognosticator of prognosticators in Pennsylvania, but did you know how many others they had?
Sutton Sammy
French Creek Freddie
Tumbleweed
Smith Lake Jake
Gus
Octoraro Orphie
Balzac Billy
Woody the Woodchuck
Sir Walter Wally
Grady the Groundhog
Chuckles
Olaf
Susquehanna Sherman
Poor Richard
Dover Doug
Malverne Mel
Holtsville Hal
Uni
Wiarton Willie
Shubenacadie Sam
Jimmy the Groundhog
Stormy Marmot
Mountain Maryland Murray
Staten Island Chuck
Buckeye Chuck
Dunkirk Dave
General Beauregard Lee
Queen Charlotte
Think it’s ridiculous yet? And these rodents are celebrities in these places. They keep special phone lines open for them in case of emergencies. Prima donnas!?
The weird thing is that we have ways to predict the weather that are much older and way stranger. There is the old folklore proverb poem thing:
Red sky at night, sailor’s delight,
Red sky at morning, sailors take warning.
Actually means something real. Most weather systems typically move from west to east, and a red sky or red clouds happen when the sun shines on the undersides of the clouds at either sunrise or sunset. At these two times of day, because the sun’s light is passing at a very low angle through the thickest part of the earth’s atmosphere, it results in the scattering out of most of the colors with shorter wavelengths of the visible spectrum (the greens, blues, and violets) and so sunlight is heavy at the red end of the spectrum. If the morning skies are red, it is because clear skies to the east let the sun reflect off the moisture-bearing clouds coming in from the west. On the other hand, in order to see red clouds in the evening, sunlight must have a clear path from the west in order to illuminate moisture-bearing clouds moving off to the east. This is information is very helpful near two bodies of water. What is Lake Titicaca and what are the Finger Lakes?
The same way with people who can hold their bad joints and say that rain is coming. There is some truth to that also. They feel this because in the drop in atmospheric pressure the blood vessels dilate and cause aggravation of already irritated nerves.
These types of predictions might be a little more accurate to predict local weather because the groundhog is actually less accurate than even merely chance. The NCDC says the overall prediction rate of the various groundhogs in America is 39% accuracy. Sounds to me like Jordan Jefferson and Tim Tebow could be groundhogs if all you need is 39% accuracy. Speaking of accuracy, Sarah Palin and her Alaskan legislature changed February 2nd to Marmot Day in Alaska because there are very few groundhogs in the state. What a maverick. While we are changing national holidays, can we finally change Columbus Day? Can’t we just call it discovery day or something, since we can’t decide on who was here first? Of all the people in question we know for sure Columbus didn’t even set foot on the lower 48 of the US in his 3 trips to the “New World”. Not to mention the fact that PEOPLE WERE ALREADY HERE!
Anyways, whether you call it Groundhog or Marmot Day or Siebenschläfertag or St. Swithun’s Day or even just February 2nd, we should all watch Bill Murray to make our day better.
